I re-stumbled on My Fair Wedding on Netflix.

I love the trainwreck of Pirate/Mermaid weddings.

Yesterday I got the best/weirdest sales call ever.

A man who I spoke with about a month ago called to follow up on a Chrysler 300, but he wasn't calling for himself. He was calling on behalf of his ex sister-in-law.

Ex-sister-in-law convinced her ex-husband to get hypnotised to help him stop smoking, but during she also tried to hypnotise him to get this car and put it in HER name.

This guy wanted me to call the hypnotised man and keep using the word "purchase" as a follow up call.

After I hung up I laughed for a solid 20 minutes.

@Ri L.: Duchess Gummybuns: Perhaps a trip to a Chik-fil-a with a playground during the daytime hours needs to be in my future.

Although, it fever is starting to die down. For a few days there is was full on baby-mania.

@What Name the 2nd: I am joking about the condom thing, but the fear that I will become possessed by baby fever has become one of the things that keep me up at night.

A few years ago I did find myself with an unwanted pregnancy and before my abortion my biggest fear was that my hormones would take over my rational brain and convince me to keep a baby I didn't want and couldn't take care of.

A period tracker app has been a great tool.

Thank you for making me feel a bit more normal.

@miel: I've had really good luck with Backcounty and Moosejaw for sale North Face and Patagonia.

Just buy it on your credit card so you can dispute the charge if needed. It's a super cute coat!

@Fanciful Feline: I'm so sorry. Getting suddenly displaced is such a terrifying and disorienting experience. I hope that your new home will be happy and safe.

*hugs*

@walkawayrenee: In the past week something inside me has snapped and this endless chant of babies, babies, babies has started in my brain. This is really disconcerting because I have no rational desire to have children, raise children, or be around children. I don't want the responsibility and even if I did nothing in my life is conducive to having children.

Luckily, my logic brain is still in control. However, the urge to have/make babies is terrifying me. I am afraid the desire will possess me to mainline prenatal vitamins and poke holes in the condoms.

I told Boyfriend last night that I think my brain is being hijacked. He finds my angst hilarious.

How do I make this stop?

Help, my body is trying to betray me. Baby rabies ITR

Unsolicited product update.

If you need a home carpet cleaner the Hoover SteamVac is effing awesome. I went over my carpet 4* times today since it hadn't been cleaned since we moved in and everything smells fresh and the white carpet looks awesome. It got out mud, wine, and the smell of puppy accidents. It does have a heating unit but I still filled it with the hottest water possible.

My apartment smells so clean.

[amazon.com]

*Pass 1- Hot Water, Pass 2- Simple Green/Natures Miracle, Pass 3- Hot Water(after pretreating stubborn spots) Pass 4- Heavy Duty Floor Cleaner

@Sabriel: I think driving away from that woman was the best solution.

I've been a little bit stupid today. I've missed a few words in conversation, but other than that I managed to do all of my chores and errands. It seems to take me about a day or two to really get back to full operational capacity.